What Have You Got to Lose?
by thewriterwhocameinfromthecold
Summary: Sometimes, it's easier to wish for the happiness of someone else than for ourselves, because in love triangles it is impossible for everyone to be happy. Keitaro/Naru, Keitaro/Kitsune. No character bashing.


Foreword: The following takes place after Chapter 71 – spoilers – wherein Keitaro is having doubts about Naru's feelings after he confesses to her in his hospital bed and she says nothing. Kitsune tries to seduce him as a joke, and relents when he resists, promising to be there for him in the tough times. Naru discovers Kitsune wearing her high school uniform and naturally wonders what the hell is going on.

Disclaimer: I don't own Love Hina, or its characters, and I am receiving no monetary compensation for this writing.

"Ow, ow, not the ear!" Kitsune cried as Naru dragged her across the hallway and into the hot springs changing room. "That hurt!" she said as Naru released her and slammed the door.

Naru rounded on her oldest, dearest friend, a fire burning in her eyes. Kitsune quailed as Naru cracked her knuckles, her lips curling into a snarl. For one brief moment, the Fox of Hinata felt same fear as her landlord whenever Naru and Motoko exacted retribution.

"Now, Naru," Kitsune trembled, waving her arms in warding, "let's not be too hasty."

"Just what was that out there?" Naru growled in her throat.

Kitsune backed away until she collided with the hot spring door. "That," she stammered, "Now that was just a joke."

"A joke?" Naru pointed an accusing finger. "You're wearing my school uniform! You kissed him!"

"On the forehead," Kitsune said in a weak voice. "I was just trying to get a rise out of Keitaro, that's all. Just embarrass him a little. Just like always."

Naru's rage turned to scepticism. "You needed my uniform to do that? You needed to kiss him to do that?"

"On the fore-"

"Screw on the forehead, Kitsune. You kissed him, and that is not the same thing as just teasing him."

"What are you talking about?"

"Keitaro's not like other guys, Kitsune. You heard me. If you kiss a guy that naïve he won't get the joke. He'll get the wrong idea."

"The wrong idea? You're one to talk. After saying in your diary that the only reason you're happy to see Keitaro back is that he's here to do the cleaning."

Naru clenched her fist. "You read-"

"Yes, yes." Kitsune waved in dismissal. "I read it. Is that really all you feel?"

"Well, I-"

"Eh! Wrong answer! How can you still be unsure after all this time?" Kitsune pointed at Naru. "If I had what you have, I wouldn't be so damned stupid about it!"

Naru blinked. "If you had what I have?"

Kitsune growled. "I really have to say this? That man out there – that dopey, naïve, clumsy dolt – is the kindest, sweetest, most wonderful thing that ever happened to this place. Unlike you, I know a good thing when I see it."

Naru looked at Kitsune as if she were seeing her for the first time. "Kitsune? Do you know what this sounds like?"

"Sounds like?" Kitsune asked, mystified.

"You like him."

Kitsune froze. "What are you talking about?"

Naru took a step closer. "Even I know that those are pretty heartfelt words for a friend. You really care about him."

"Of course, I care about him. He's my friend, same as you."

"Would you have tried this hard if he was just a friend?" Naru shook her head. "You care for him the same way I do, don't you?"

Kitsune snorted. "How can I have any idea how you feel about him? You never say so."

"Then I'll say it. Kitsune, I won't be mad, but I want to know the truth. You…" Naru stumbled on the words that felt heavy in her mouth. "You love him too. Just like I do."

Kitsune seemed to be backing into the wall again. "Don't be ridiculous."

Naru closed the gap between them, and took her friend by the hand. "Please tell me. Going by just a second ago, I can tell you that it feels pretty good to say the truth."

"I…" Kitsune stared into her friends eyes, and saw no reprimand, only coaxing friendship. It was only that friendship that kept her going as the denials that she herself had been fostering came crashing down. "I…I offered to take your place," she mumbled.

"What?"

"I offered to be to him what you were," Kitsune said, her voice wondering. "And deep down," she looked up at Naru in astonishment, "I meant it. I've never had what he's given you, and I wanted it."

Naru's stomach tossed and turned as Kitsune's confession continued.

"You know what happened then?" Kitsune asked.

Naru shook her head.

Kitsune's brow furrowed in surprise. "He rejected me," she said, astonished. "He resisted the temptation I offered in a way I wish I'd been able to resist my whole life."

"What do you mean?" Naru asked, coming closer.

Kitsune turned away as she felt her eyes began to sting. "I didn't always want to be a drunk, you know."

Naru forgot all her anger as she brought her hands to her friend's shoulders. "You're not," she said.

"I am."

Naru turned her friend around. "You're not. None of us see you that way."

"No?" Kitsune asked in a little voice.

Naru hugged her friend tight. "No, I promise."

Kitsune nestled herself into the crook of Naru's shoulder, and just let herself be there with her friend.

"There's more," she said as she pulled away. Naru looked at her, curious. Kitsune took a shuddering breath. "Then I kissed him. I lied to him, and said that it was okay, that you'd come around, and I kissed him." She bit her knuckle. "I kissed him goodbye, because I knew then, if it wasn't you offering, he'd never take it."

Kitsune felt a wave wash over her. She pushed Naru towards the hallway door by the shoulders. "Now you go and decide what you're doing about this."

"What?" Naru asked even as she dug her feet in.

Kitsune pushed harder. "He went to Tokyo U for you, he traveled to the end of the earth for you, he turned me down for you; just what the hell do you think you've got to lose?" She reached past Naru and shoved the door open. "Do something before he loses hope."

Naru braced herself against the doorframe. "Kitsune, why are you doing this?"

Kitsune's expression turned sombre again. "Because you're both my dear friends, and I love you both. I want you to be happy."

"Who makes you happy?" Naru asked, with a tremor in her voice.

Kitsune felt her nerve began to weaken. She shoved Naru out the door, and slammed it shut. "You both will. Now get out of here and leave me alone."

Kitsune bit the inside of her cheek as she heard Naru run off. She punched the wall.

"Why? Why am I always giving up guys for her?"

"Kitsune?"

Kitsune spun towards the hall door in surprise. She'd been so wrapped up in herself that she hadn't even noticed the sound of the door sliding open again.

"Keitaro? What are you doing here?"

Keitaro stepped into the change room, a room that always held foreboding for him, and this time was no different. "I heard Naru run up the stairs. I thought I'd see how you were."

Kitsune forced a smile. "Shouldn't you be looking after her?"

Keitaro hopped into the room on his crutch. "I'm responsible for everyone under this roof. Not just Naru."

Kitsune hated him for saying something like that. If he said something like that, then…

"Well, no harm done, as you can see."

Keitaro looked at her with hurt disappointment. "I…" He paused, waiting for the words to come. "I heard what you said."

Kitsune didn't comment on his eavesdropping. She was lucky that all the other girls were gone, or they'd have driven her crazy for what she said. "Oh, that." She waved him off. "I was just trying to light a fire under her." She had to get him to go away before she lost her strength.

"Kitsune." Keitaro shook his head in disappointment. "I may not always know when you're lying, but I always know when you tell the absolute truth." He hobbled a step closer. "I'm sorry Kitsune. I had no idea."

She came within arm's length. "Neither did I. Not really." She smiled a sad smile. "But it's not enough, is it?"

Keitaro sighed, and looked away. Kitsune felt the last of her strength desert her.

"Why? Why is she always better than me? Why aren't I good enough?"

Keitaro dropped his crutch and jumped towards her, hugging her to him. "It's not about good enough, Kitsune. I love you."

She swooned against him as the words spread warmness through her chest.

"I love all the girls here. But I'm in love with Naru. There's no comparing someone you're in love with someone else."

Kitsune didn't want to let him go. She heard the words, and wished, prayed that they could be for her; but she knew that she owed Naru and Keitaro more than that. She pulled back.

"Well said. You've really grown up." She looked at him in uncertainty for the first time since they'd met. "Can I ask you one last thing?"

Keitaro smiled, and nodded. "What is it?"

Her eyes opened wide so he could see the longing that radiated deep within. "Can I kiss you goodbye?"

Keitaro began to look frightened, and Kitsune was not offended. It appalled her that she was asking after all she had said. But the lonely girl inside willed her to keep going.

"I well," Keitaro stammered. "I'm not going anywhere."

"That's not the kind of goodbye I mean." She clung to him as she stared down, imploring. "May I? May I kiss you goodbye, please?"

He nodded. She leaned forward until her lips touched his, feather light at first. Then she brushed her tongue against his lips. He opened them in surprise, and she seized her opportunity and forgot her loyalty again. She sought the deepest part of him, asking, begging him to take what she gave. But he did nothing more than accept her.

Kitsune's eyes stung as she pulled back, and rested her forehead against his. "It's still not enough, is it?"

Keitaro had tears in his eyes. "No," he croaked. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you crying?"

"Because you are."

She inhaled sharply, kissed him on the forehead and backed away. She picked up her crutch and handed it to him. "You'd better go before I decide one isn't enough," she said. "Go on. I'll be all right."

She turned towards the hot spring, unable to watch him walk away.

"See you," he said, because he had no idea what else to say, and shut the door.

Kitsune braced herself against the wall as she pitched forward. The tears began to fall as she fell to her knees.

"I was right. I am too nice for my own good."

.

Keitaro found Naru on the roof, just as he'd expected. She was staring off into the beginning of the sunset. Keitaro paused to marvel at how the orange light caught the hair of his beloved – promise or no promise, that's what she was. Not wanting to startle her, he called out her name. She turned, her expression far away.

"I forgot you were here," she said. "You shouldn't be trying to climb all those stairs with your broken leg."

"I had to see you," he said, "Because…" He froze as all his eloquence deserted him when it mattered most. "Because…Because I heard what you were arguing about, and I wanted make sure…" Why couldn't he say the words to her?

"You were listening?" Naru's expression was inscrutable.

Keitaro nearly lost the balance of his crutch as he gesticulated in denial. "I was trying not to. I think they were trying not to in Hong Kong."

Naru giggled, and Keitaro felt gladdened to see mirth wash the gloom from her eyes. She looked down at her feet, and her smile turned bittersweet.

"We've been at this a long time, haven't we?" she said, gesturing between them.

Keitaro said, "Yes," uncertain of what else to say.

Naru turned back ot the railing. I never thought about how the others might feel. Kitsune's my best friend and I…" She turned to Keitaro in a rush. "And you came to me. Why? Why do you always come back to me?"

Keitaro hobbled forward on his crutch. "Because I couldn't…not." He shook himself, willing the words to come. "I meant what I said at the hospital. I love you, and I will even if you don't because I can't…not."

Naru grabbed him by the shoulders, nearly knocking him over. Then her lips met his and they sank together into the pleasure of love given and love accepted.

Three years later, Keitaro adjusted his tuxedo jacket, and raised a glass of champagne. "Thank you all for coming here," he said. "My wife and I would like to offer a toast to the one person to whom we owe this event: the Maid of Honour."

All eyes in the reception hall turned to Kitsune, almost as beautiful in her green bridesmaid dress as the bride herself.

Naru Urashima rose with her new husband, raising her own glass. "To Mitsune Konno. If it weren't for your trickery" – the hall echoed with laughter – "your veiled comments," Naru turned sombre, "your advice, your support, your," Naru stammered, "your love, and your sacrifice, we wouldn't be here today."

"To Mitsune!" the hall echoed.

Naru mouthed 'Thank you' to Kitsune as she raised her glass to her lips. From her place at the table, Kitsune smiled back.

"We will now open up the dance floor," Haitani, the best man called. "where the bride and groom will share their first dance as a wedded couple."

The song didn't even enter Kitsune's ears as she watched her best friends take the floor. She watched as Naru gave her husband an adoring smile while he spun her around the room. Kitsune hoped Naru was glad that her husband wasn't stepping on her toes. It had taken a lot of time and effort to teach him secretly how to dance. She felt a pang. Why was it possible to do the right thing and still feel bad?

"Excuse me?"

Kitsune looked up to see a tall man with short dark hair and glasses looking down at her with his hand out. She didn't recognise him, figuring that he must be from the groom's side of the family.

"Would you care to dance?" the man asked.

Kitsune looked over at the dance floor, where Naru and Keitaro were dancing father and farther off. She turned and smiled at the man.

"Sure," she said. "Why not?"

The Beginning.


End file.
